It is so easy for our communication with others to get derailed.  There are infinite distractions that can get in our way and often we are so busy preparing our response that we aren’t truly listening in the first place.  So I would encourage you to stop thinking about communication in terms of talking and listening and frame it in terms of advocacy and inquiry.

I was exposed to these concepts by business theorist, Chris Argyris, in the late 90’s as a graduate student at Chapman University and it remains a core teaching in any work I do with individuals or companies trying to improve their communication.

Advocacy is expressing your assumptions, beliefs, opinions and mental models with the intent of helping other people understand your position.  It’s sharing why you think the way you do and how you reached that conclusion.

Inquiry is listening actively and asking questions with the intent of understanding and appreciating the opinion/position of another and being open to changing your position based on what the other person has said.

Kevin Plank, Founder of Under Armour has nurtured a company culture that embraces advocacy and inquiry.  Leaders there are encouraged to ask themselves three key questions after a conversation or meeting.

  1. Did I hear you?
  2. Did I understand your meaning?
  3. Are we clear on what needs to happen next?

Then finish the following statements:

  1. This is what I heard…
  2. This is what I think…
  3. This is what we’re going to do next…

Simple, yet profound.  Plank believes every one of the 14,000 + employees at Under Armour deserves to have their voice heard and to have clarity.

Communicating in this way is powerful and helps employees feel cared for and in turn care for each other and their customers.

If you have a friend of a colleague who needs this message, please share with them.

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